it's, um, pink. rock.

forget about me?

yeah, so i um, spent a whole bunch of money i don't have yet on a sexy, sexy new 12" powerbook. i was going to buy an ibook, but little things like twice the hard drive capacity, built-in wifi, and the hot titanium case just overpowered my financial sensibilities. fortunately, the apple store was out of ipod minis, so i didn't drop $1800 on the whole shebang, and now i can try to convince myself to pay off the computer before i buy the ipod. yeah.

work blows, but it pays. i'm looking for a better job, since the one i have is so fucking shitty. i applied at a vet's office for front desk, and today i submitted my resume to be a "mac genius" at the apple store where i just spent all that cash. i'm not really a mac genius, but i think i could become one - i *did* have that year and a half stint as an RCC at stanford, and apple knows stanford, so i think they'd be impressed.... and how fucking cool would that job be, working at the genius bar at the store down the street...

i vaguely remember opening blogger with some purpose in mind, other than to put down all this meaningless drivel. i had something to say, and now it's escaped me. so i guess i'll just say that mac os 10.3 kicks absolute ass, and that my new computer is sexier than you, your girlfriend, and your best friend's mom put together. and i'm going to see harry potter tomorrow. i can't wait.

oh, by the way, i still exist. i promise. i just don't blog much since my computer doesn't turn on and i have to use jared's. it's march, i'm still unemployed, but the weather is getting better. in other news, i don't miss school, but if you're reading this, and you're at stanford, odds are i miss you. unemployment is nice except for the fact that i have no money. i got my washington drivers license today. so i'm officially a resident i think. which means i should be able to enroll at UW for spring quarter next year. um, yeah. blah, yo. seattle could be a little more interesting if it tried, i think.

Your Ultimate Purity Score Is...
Category	Your Score	Average
Self-Lovin'	60% Explored the pleasures of the flesh	65%
Shamelessness	57.1% It takes a couple of drinks	79.4%
Sex Drive	68.4% A fool for love, but not always	77.7%
Straightness	7.1% Knows the other body type like a map	44.9%
Gayness	83.9% Repressed, are we?	83.5%
Fucking Sick	77.9% Refreshingly normal	89.9%
You are 57.54% pure Average Score: 72.6%
Take The Ultimate Purity Test and see how you match up!

whelp, i'm here. in tacoma. i've spent the last few days looking for a place to live and a job... no leads as of yet, but it's not so bad. I'm being a housebitch for Jared (and brian) which makes me feel better about taking up space and breathing their air. this morning i cleaned the kitchen, and then i went grocery shopping.

i got sammich stuff and granola bars so we can have munchies on the slopes tomorrow. Happy birthday to me!

Happy birthday to meeeeeee, i live in a treeeeeee, i look like a monkey, and i smell like one too!

yup, it's my 21st birthday, and i woke up like a trooper with a hangover. As is customary for such occasions. anyway, having a hangover tomorrow would totally suck, so it's a good thing that i got my celebratin' done last night.

t minus 18 hours!!!

t minus 36 hours until departure. rock out.

i packed and halfway cleaned my room today. tomorrow (when i'm not celebrating my birthday by purchasing and/or consuming alcohol) i'll finish cleaning, pack that last-minute stuff, and load up the car. and then in exactly 36 hours i'll rouse my ass out of bed and pump some coffee into my bloodstream, and get on down the road.

my doctor's physicians' assistant gets my vote for biggest dumb-dumb of the year. evidently when she was trying to reschedule me for an earlier appointment, she DELETED the old appointment for today, so when i went in today everyone looked at me like a moron. Yay. she lost all semblance of credibility with me the day she told me that i needed to take my birth control for a "full 30 days" before it would become effective. First of all it comes in packs of 28, not 30. AND second of all, let's review the female reproductive system. Youre supposed to start taking the pills the day your period starts. You're not fertile then, and won't be for 14 days. So you'll have about 2 weeks worth of the drug in your body by the time you're supposed to ovulate, and it suppresses ovulation. Yes, even the first month. So, if no egg pops out, no spermy can meet with an egg, and no baby results. I guess they didn't teach her that in the 2-year degree she's got. You'd think it would include a basic anatomy class... evidently not.

ok. /rant.

well, t minus 3 days until departure. rock.

use mozilla firebird. it rules.

blaaaargh, my computer is too high-maintenance. mother fucker.

also i think it hit 80 today and we have all the windows open at home. but now it is getting cold and it is dark and the wind is blowing in. sweetness.

i had an interesting experience on new years eve which put a lot of things in perspective. for one, who i am, and who i want to be, is for me to decide, and only me. in the big picture it is not a big deal if i disappoint my parents - the sun will come up the next morning. if i don't have a concrete idea of where i want to be in ten years, there is nothing wrong with that. all i know is that for now, i am taking the first step off into a new world, and i feel in my gut that it's the right decision. i also decided that i haven't got a reason to be depressed anymore, and that i need to just pull my head out of my ass and stop it. and, i think i might want to work in civil service. doing something for a non-profit that's working for something i really feel is worthwhile. i remember being really touched by the newspaper spread on this ad campaign that actresses were doing - it's animated, and it's public service messages about things people need to know about. depression, anorexia, bulimia, i think they're making one about self-injury - serious emotional and mental health issues that are just not talked about enough in society. i really was interested by that campaign (i still have yet to see the ads on tv; i watch far too little of it for that to happen) and wished that i could help - i want to be one of the animators, or perhaps one of the writers. i want to make public service announcements that people can relate to. i want to help tell the people in the world that are hurting that it's okay to cry, and that there is help for them when they are ready for it.

well, i put another $217 into that fucking car today, but it should be good for the trip now. whee. that includes 4 tires, alignment on all 4 wheels, all that shit, and a tank of gas.

got a lot done today though, banking, car, doctor's appointment, stuff like that.

mom wants me to stay here through my birthday. i don't really know how i feel about that, it is my 21st after all, and none of my friends will be here, they'll have all gone back to school. bleh. i would really rather spend it with jared. :/

wish list

8 days until i'm on the road. things to do before then, namely on monday: call swedish auto dudes about tie-rod ends. call doctor about rescheduling appointment.

today i could sort my stuff into "take" and "don't take" piles, that would be useful. hmm.

my life is exciting.

car repair tally: $144 for new catalytic converter, $39.50 for inspection (IT PASSED! WOOHOO!), $2.44 for new wiper blades. still need new tie-rod ends. whatever the fuck tie-rod ends are. (they're a part of the steering system, right by the front wheels. fun stuff, yo.)

days until departure: t minus 9 days. woohoo!

check out my route. whee.

i painted yesterday, i should take a picture of it and upload it. i should also get that online gallery thing that i keep talking about up and running.

i took my car into midas to get the catalytic converter replaced. the dude told me they couldn't guarantee that it would pass inspections. but then, no one can, because it's a piece of shit. but it runs, and that's what matters, right. sigh.

life is boring.

fucking hell. moving ain't cheap.

*sits here and prays that her dad will pay for car repairs needed before the move*

My life is rated NC-17.
What is your life rated?

i feel like painting today. the problem is that my room is so full of absolute utter shit that i can't find a spot on the floor to sit and prop a canvas in front of me. so, before i can paint, i must clean. let me tell you, my motivation to clean is a lot lower than my motivation to paint.

in other news, i lost the ebay auction for what would have been an amazing christmas present for jared. :(. oh well... i bet i can find that rare vinyl again next week... or next MILLENIUM... sigh. funny story, i was telling my brother what i was bidding on, and my mom overhears, and she goes, "does jared even OWN a TURNTABLE?" as if him owning some sort of relic from another generation as a turntable would be unheard of. actually, mom, he has two.

i hate nothing more than calling someone i don't know on the phone. it just really, really bothers me. what if they don't want to talk to me? what if they're busy, or in the middle of a meal? i'm trying to convince myself it won't be that bad, and if i don't call people, i'm never going to get a car. siiiigh.