i had an interesting experience on new years eve which put a lot of things in perspective. for one, who i am, and who i want to be, is for me to decide, and only me. in the big picture it is not a big deal if i disappoint my parents - the sun will come up the next morning. if i don't have a concrete idea of where i want to be in ten years, there is nothing wrong with that. all i know is that for now, i am taking the first step off into a new world, and i feel in my gut that it's the right decision. i also decided that i haven't got a reason to be depressed anymore, and that i need to just pull my head out of my ass and stop it. and, i think i might want to work in civil service. doing something for a non-profit that's working for something i really feel is worthwhile. i remember being really touched by the newspaper spread on this ad campaign that actresses were doing - it's animated, and it's public service messages about things people need to know about. depression, anorexia, bulimia, i think they're making one about self-injury - serious emotional and mental health issues that are just not talked about enough in society. i really was interested by that campaign (i still have yet to see the ads on tv; i watch far too little of it for that to happen) and wished that i could help - i want to be one of the animators, or perhaps one of the writers. i want to make public service announcements that people can relate to. i want to help tell the people in the world that are hurting that it's okay to cry, and that there is help for them when they are ready for it.

No comments: