so for some reason i totally just got all reminiscent... started going through all the stuff on my shelves in my room which led to my cap for graduation which led to me standing in front of the mirror holding up my gown wearing my cap... and going through old pictures. it's so weird. i miss the old life i used to have here at home, but not that much. i don't get it. my friends here are all great but it seems that we had so many differences it's amazing we got along. i dunno. looking at old photos puts me in a weird mood.

i also ran across my ticket and the picture from once in a blue moon. god what an event. its epicness is evident from the lineup - paul oakenfold, chemical brothers, sasha and digweed, pete tong... but i think it really changed my life. it's kind of weird to think about that. i mean, before the rave, i was kind of fringe friends with eric - neither one of us really fit into the other's social circle - but afterwards i not only completely solidified an awesome friendship with him but also integrated myself into a whole new circle which led to what would have happened this summer if it weren't for jessie and her bitchiness and, well, tim. and the most incredible 10 days of my life. and other things.

it's a mind trip to think about what would have been if certain things had gone differently, isn't it? sometimes i even start to wonder if there is a such thing as fate, because everything in my life has worked out so fucking well up to this point (ok, "fate", i'm waiting to see what you have in store for this whole me-staying-home-this-summer thing...)

ok, i'll shut up now.